Of Cerberus and Masamune
by sehkret winsister
Summary: A collection of drabbles centered on the SephVin pairing. Possibly OOC and can be AU at times.
1. Are you sure?

_**A/N:** This collection will just random little scenes that pop into my head, so I'll jot them down and put them here. Small requests for this drabble series are welcome, because Lord knows I rather lacking in the creative department. Well, enough of my rambling. Enjoy!_

_**Disclaimer:** I have threatened Square Enix with a spork to hand over their bishies so I could own them... they didn't even give me the action figures._

* * *

Sephiroth gave Vincent a sidelong glance from where he was sitting on the couch. "You _sure_ you're virgin?"

The raven-haired man indignantly spat, "Yes, I am. I wouldn't lie about something like that."

"I mean, by the way you talk, I doubt that sometimes," intoned the 'One-Winged Angel' blandly.

Vincent huffed. "You know what? Don't talk to me. This is what? The eleventh time in fifteen minutes?" he ground out as he made to leave the living room.

Sephiroth grabbed for Vincent's wrist, preventing him from leaving. In one fluid movement Sephiroth tugged his wrist until Vincent was seated in his lap. As much as Vincent hated to admit, he blushed.

"W-what are you d-doing...?" Vincent managed to choke out.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" a slow smirk spread across the swordsman's face. "Or more along the lines of, what does it _feel_ like I'm doing?"

The silver-haired man's hands flitted over Vincent's stomach, sides, chest, and rested at his hips. The gunman barely contained a moan, biting his lower lip. Then Vincent felt Sephiroth's lips ghost over his own.

All of a sudden the front door burst open and Vincent nearly fell off his lap. Sephiroth growled, so Vincent looked up and there was Reno standing there grinning like the Cheshire cat.

"Did I interrupt something?

"Yes, you did. I was _this_ close to getting lai-"

Vincent cut Sephiroth off. "No, not at all. What brings you here?"

Reno rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "I accidentally dyed Rude's head purple?"

Sephiroth looked at him skeptically raising a silver eyebrow. "Accidentally?"

Reno held up his hands, "No, man! I swear it was! I was holding a pitcher of grape punch and Elena tripped me. Then the next thing I know I'm climbing into the vents and escaping to here cuz I want to keep proof of my manliness, yo."

Vincent looked scathingly at Sephiroth and decided he could do with some revenge. He looked over at Reno sweetly. "Do you know what I want to do to you right now at this very moment in time?"

Clear aqua eyes narrowed slightly in suspicion. "What's that?"

Vincent smirked, "I want to throw myself upon your lean body, snatch off your hair tie, flick it in Sephiroth's eye, rip off your suit, and molest you like there's no tomorrow."

Reno's eyes widened in shock. Where did _that_ come from? Reno grinned after the initial shock had worn off.

"What's stoppin' you, sweetheart?" drawled the redhead.

"The 6'1" tall specimen of a male over there, lounging on the couch, glaring at us," Vincent gave said man a burning look.

"And why is this specimen glaring?" Reno asked not playing the game so much because of the Jenova Glare of Doom©Sephiroth.

"Eh, probably because he wanted (and still wants) in my pants and you ruined it when you burst in. Plus, the fact that he's probably wanted me to say something along the lines of what I said to you to him for a while now. Then you waltz in uninvited, unexpected and one of the first things I say to you is that," Vincent shrugged.

"Oh..." the redhead's mouth shaped the letter of the sound.

"For such large egos, SOLDIERs are so insecure. Said specimen of a male should know how much I want him. He _is_ the one who got me all hot and bothered..." Vincent rolled his eyes heading to a more _private_ room, his hips slightly swaying in a rather seductive manner.

Sephiroth scrambled to claim the soon-to-be-nonexistent man virginity of Vincent's; which never really existed anyway. Sephiroth took it when he was drunk one night but Sephiroth didn't need to know that.

* * *

_**A/N**: Read and Review please!_


	2. Phone call

_**A/N**: Another one for you...! All of these (already stated in the first chapter) are completely and utterly random and probably won't (and don't necessarily) connect with each other. So if Vincent and Sephiroth in one drabble are snarky at each and another has them all mushy and cutesy, you'll know why. It's really all according to my mood and what struck me that day. Look at me, I'm rambling again... -shakes head- Go on! Enjoy!_

_Author: Disclaimer, if you would, Vincent?  
Vincent: No.  
Author: Sephiroth?  
Sephiroth: -grins evilly and pulls down Vincent's pants far enough to show a bit of his buttcheek-  
Vincent: Wha-!? -flails-  
-on buttcheek- OWNED BY THE ONE-WINGED ANGEL, SEPHIROTH  
Author: -sighs- Why did I even ask? -removes both men's shoes-  
-on soles of each left foot- Property of Square Enix._

* * *

The PHS rang. A pale, slender hand picked it up.

"Valentine speaking," mumbled a gruff, sleep filled voice.

A deep, velvety voice spoke on the other line without preamble, "Your pain was literally indescribable. It felt like I was dying. There was just _so much_ pain. Obviously, you and I had something together, and it had run deep. But somehow I had forgotten. At that moment, however, nothing else mattered except you. I would have done anything to make your pain go away. I was drowning... in your pain, your eyes, your tears, your everything.

"'Don't cry, dear Shiva, don't cry. I do not deserve your tears. I can not breathe. It tears me up inside.'

"This had to be gasped this out. I could not breathe. While saying this, my eyes filled with tears. Somehow, you ended sitting in my lap. I cupped your face with my hands and wiped your tears away with my thumbs. I guided my hands up to your bandanna and I slid it off. I put it next to me on the couch, and your hair flowed down around your face.

"'Sweet Shiva, you're beautiful,' I whispered."

At this point, Vincent Valentine was staring at the phone as if the person on the other line could see the incredulous look on his face. Still, the voice kept talking.

"I wiped your face one last time and cupped your face in my hands again. Then I slid one of my hands to the side of your neck. I felt your fingers tangle with my hair, and I looked to see your face merely inches away from my own. My eyes closed slowly as we kissed. I put my other hand on your waist, pulling you closer. Your lips moved against mine, deepening the kiss.

"All of a sudden the door burst open.

"And that's what happened in my dream. I'm going to kill the bastard or bitch that dared ruin my moment with you... in my dream."

Vincent blinked; he opened his mouth then closed it, unable to find anything to say for a moment. Finally, he spoke.

"I do not know whether to be disturbed or flattered. Though I am leaning more to the disturbed side."

"Oh don't be like that, Valentine. You know you like being the center of my attention," chuckled the voice.

"So, you called me at..." the raven-haired man looked at the clock which read 2 AM, "_two in the morning_ to tell this to me, Sephiroth?"

"Of course," said the ex-General, his voice suspiciously sounding like he was smirking. "And by the by, I don't think your fish likes me too much. You know how beta fish tend to frill out their gills at their reflections because they believe it is a threat/another male fish? Well, he does that to me quite often. I'm rather offended; not at the fact he sees me as a threat but the fact he possibly sees me as another fish. My humanity has become questionable because of a 4-inch beta fish in a _jar_ on my_ desk_. Also, your fish implying subtly that I too am a _fish_ has done unspeakable things to my humanity; sending it to a dark corner of my mind and has caused it to have the audacity to ask me if I'm really human. I reassure my humanity that if I were a fish I would have gills, scales and a tail would exist. Still, my humanity will mock me for good measure of time. In conclusion, your fish, dearest Vincent, is an arse. Now, open the door."

Vincent sighed, kicked off the sheets and got up. He walked out of his room and went through his living room to open the front door with the phone still next to his ear.

Sephiroth was standing there on the phone grinning sexily at him. The silver-haired man snapped the phone shut and Vincent followed suit more slowly.

"What do you want, Sephiroth?" Vincent asked tiredly, wanting sleep.

"I think you know, Vincent... I want to continue that dream, just without the angst and in person," Sephiroth replied as he let his eyes travel the length of Vincent's body, taking in the sight of how Vincent was shirtless and the pajama pants that were dangerously low on Vincent's hips.

The gunman groaned and thumped his head repeatedly against the door frame he was leaning on. Why, _why_? And _now_ of all times. Wait, how the _hell_ did Sephiroth have Mr. PoofyCheeks his fish?

A hand reached out and stopped Vincent from abusing his head.

"Don't do that. You'll have a bump on that pretty little head of yours that I like so much," chided the swordsman amusedly, letting himself in and closing the door.

"There is no way I can get out of this, is there?" the raven-haired man asked resignedly.

"No way in hell," the silver-haired 'angel' threw him a predatory smile.

Vincent was dragged away to his own room. It was going to be a _long_ night and knowing Sephiroth it would be a long morning too. He sighed.

* * *

_**A/N:** Can you tell I had way too much fun with the A/N at the top? X3 Hope you enjoyed! Read and Review!_


	3. Stripped

_**A/N**: I rather like this one..._

_Author: Disclaimer, anyone?  
Reno: No own, no sue, yo.  
Rude: ..._

* * *

Vincent walked through the doorway to be greeted by a supposedly empty house. As he walked by the couch someone wrapped their arms around his waist causing him to fall into their lap. Those pair of arms belonged to a tall, gorgeous silver-haired man by the name of Sephiroth.

The silver-haired 'angel' leaned down to breath into Vincent's ear. "I love you... I love you so much I..." he gave a throaty groan, "don't know what I'd do without you..."

Sephiroth pressed the gunman tightly against his front, and then turned the raven-haired man around to face him, sensually nuzzling the ex-Turk's ear, breathing in deeply. The silver-haired man let out the breath slowly as he traced Vincent's jaw with his nose making the air ghost over the sensitive skin of the gunman's neck. Vincent squeezed his eyes shut; heat pooled in his groin as his whole navel area clenched. He barely kept in the moan and shiver that threaten to escape from him.

"S-stop..." Vincent barely managed out, hands slowly traveling to Sephiroth's shirt collar.

"No, never," Sephiroth whispered against Vincent's throat nibbling ever so slightly and pushing ex-Turk down into the couch so he was on top of the expert marksman.

The raven-haired man nearly moaned as Sephiroth's fingers found their way under his shirt and pushed the shirt up, exposing his chest. The ex-General placed hot, wet, opened-mouth kisses all over Vincent's stomach and navel then traveled upward. In response, the ex-Turk's voice ended in a strangled gasp when he felt Sephiroth's tongue curl around his nipple and he trembled slightly, biting his lower lip with the effort of keeping in the moan that was at the tip of his tongue.

Sephiroth released the nipple and Vincent let out a stifled groan and shuddered at the cool air that hit it.

"Don't hold it in," Sephiroth told the gunman, capturing his lips in a kiss.

When Vincent felt little nip at his lower lip, he let the ex-General add that talented tongue of his into the kiss. When Sephiroth trailed his tongue along the roof of Vincent's mouth, he could no longer resist. The ex-Turk's long legs wrapped around Sephiroth's waist, his fingers thread through the impossibly lengthy, silver hair and arched against him. Vincent angled his head so they could kiss more deeply. The swordsman did the same, plunging his tongue into Vincent's mouth over and over again. The gunman gripped Sephiroth's hair and tugged him even closer. All the while they were grinding their hips together. Vincent pulled away from the kiss to throw his head back and give a long, low moan. Sephiroth's tongue, lips and teeth didn't stop though. They moved down to lick, bite, nibble and suck at the older man's throat. And Vincent felt him— above him, pressed to him, and he definitely felt Sephiroth's hardness against his own causing him to writhe beneath the ex-General.

Sephiroth's ministrations slowed considerably and eventually stopped. Vincent was left squirming at the lost contact and briefly wondered why the hell his lover had stopped. Crimson eyes fluttered open to see a mirror of jade that flickered with emotion. It was kaleidoscope of respect, admiration, devotion and some obscure form of joy but predominantly fear, love and anxiety. What had reduced the Great General Sephiroth, ex-war-hero and later the World's Calamity, to this? Oh right, he had. Vincent felt his searching look soften to a fond gaze. And amazingly he felt the corner of his lips pull up slightly in that little half smile Sephiroth seemed to love and be turned on by.

As the gunman pressed his lips gently against the younger man's, he reassuringly whispered, "I love you, too."

Never in all his life had Vincent been stripped of his clothes faster.

* * *

_**A/N**: I always tend to write towards humor... XD Read and review, please!_


	4. When you're drunk

_**A/N**: My friends took me to a scary movie (by the way, I'm possibly the most paranoid, easily freaked/scared person you will ever meet... possibly). So I wrote this to cheer myself up. Sorry about the shortness._

_**Disclaimer**: I only wish I did._

* * *

He was drunk. The gunman was completely and totally smashed.

"Hiiiiii Sephy."

This was followed by the most ridiculous grin Sephiroth had ever seen in his life. Gods, he hated Vincent when he was drunk, well not really but the silver-haired man rather not deal with ex-Turk when said man was intoxicated. Contrary to popular belief, Vincent was not a complete angst-fest when he was inebriated; quite the opposite actually.

"I hate you when you're drunk."

"Then hate me; hate me hard. Hate me in the shower, hate me in bed, hate me when I'm bent over the table, hate me till you can't hate me no more. Then in the morning, make sweet hate to me..." slurred out the raven-haired man as he sprawled over the ex-General's lap.

A slow, smirk spread across Sephiroth's face.

"Much obliged, my dearest Valentine."

Maybe he didn't mind a drunk Vincent all too much anymore... if this was what came of it.

* * *

_**A/N**: Let me know what you think!_


	5. Interrupted

_**A/N**: This just kind of played out. Tell me what you think of it. What I wouldn't give to listen to the answering machine of Vincent Valentine. XDD_

_**Disclaimer**: If I owned them quite a few yaoi fangirls would be very happy, passed out, nosebleeding or all three._

* * *

Flushed cheeks. Slick bodies. Delicate shivers. Hot tongues. Blind groping. Racking shudders. Wandering hands. Stifled groans. Seeking fingers. Strangled gasps. Frantic kisses. Hushed moans.

The phone rings, and it is ignored. The answering machine comes on.

"_You've reached the Valentine residence. I am not available at the moment; leave a message and I will return your call as soon as possible_." _BEEP._

"_Valentine, pick up the damn phone! I know yer home! Shera wouldn't let me take the Highwind an' now I'm lost. But I know I'm near yer place. Come pick me up, wouldja?_"

A voice Vincent knew all too well floated through the bedroom door that stood ajar and he sighed in defeat.

"You are _not_ thinking of leaving," the silver-haired man above him breathed against the ex-Turk's neck not stopping his ministrations whatsoever. It was a statement not a question.

"I have to," the ebony-haired man whispered even as he tilted his head back so Sephiroth could do as he pleased. "He's my friend."

Sephiroth let out a sigh of aggravation and with a simple: "the faster I let you go, the faster you come back", the ex-General let Vincent leave, but not without a breath-taking, soul-searing kiss. Vincent quickly grabbed the closest thing, which happened to be a towel, and knotted it around his waist. He did not even bother putting on shoes and ran out in house slippers while grabbing his keys.

Key in ignition. Turn. Start engine. Reverse. Pull out of driveway. Clutch. Shift to gear one. Release. Pull on to road.

He didn't even know where the blonde pilot was, but if he was nearby, it wouldn't take too long.

Clutch. Shift to gear two. Release. Gain speed.

Vincent was about to change gears again when he spotted Cid Highwind. The ex-Turk pulled up beside the pilot and rolled down the window.

"Get in, Highwind, before I just leave you here," the raven-haired man ground out.

"Alright, alright, geez!" the blonde man rushed in. "You okay, Valentine?"

Saying Vincent was not a happy camper would have been an understatement. Vincent was one royally pissed off gunman; as any man would be if they had been interrupted.

"No, I am not okay, but thank you for asking," said gunman snapped back sarcastically as he absentmindedly itched his leg, and Cid realized what Vincent was wearing.

"What are ya wearin' under that towel?"

"_Nothing_."

Something clicked into place.

"What were ya doin' before ya came ta pick me up?"

"_Someone._"

Silence reigned for a grand total 30 seconds.

"I thought I'd just mention that I left my keys at home an' I don't think Shera's gonna get up fer me."

Vincent felt his eye twitch and focused on his driving.

Clutch. Shift to gear two. Release. Gain speed. Stop sign. Slow. Clutch. Shift out of gear. Stop. Wait three seconds. Clutch. Shift to gear one. Release. Gain speed.

Vincent aimed to arrive home safely. Which they did.

"Out of the car, Highwind."

"I'm goin', I'm goin'."

The two friends got out of the car and went into the house. The gunman headed directly for his bedroom; then removed the towel, put on pajama pants and threw the dirty slippers and towel into the dirty laundry basket.

When he came outside, Cid mumbled that he 'had to use the can' as he pointed in the direction of the bathroom and said he'd call up Cloud to come pick him up. Vincent grit his teeth and wondered why the _hell_ the Highwind didn't do that in the first place. The ex-Turk looked around the living room to see Sephiroth sitting on the couch, twiddling his thumbs. It was almost as pathetic as it was amusing. Or was it almost as amusing as it was pathetic? It didn't matter anymore. The raven-haired man gingerly sat himself down next to his lover.

"I'm sorry I have such _frustratingly annoying_ friends," he said exasperatedly pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I HEARD THAT, YA BASTARD!" was heard from the bathroom. Both of them winced.

"No, it's alright. I have Zack and Tseng has Reno," reassured the swordsman.

"But Reno is Tseng's lover," countered Vincent.

"Close enough."

"I'm not annoying, am I?"

"No, not at all."

Cid came out of the bathroom and told them he'd be going now because Cloud was there to pick him up.

The two sat in comfortable silence. The ex-Turk idly itched his leg again and rested his hand on his thigh palm up. A more or less equally pale, slender hand lined itself up like a near mirror image to his own. The ebony-haired man watched as the swordsman's fingers slowly intertwined with his.

Sure, the sex was great but it was times like these that Vincent really lived for and he let himself gently place his head against Sephiroth's shoulder. Sephiroth smiled softly as he pressed a kiss to the top of Vincent's head.

* * *

_**A/N**: R&R if you please! And please tell me how I did the 'driving part'. I've never driven before so please correct me if I'm wrong._


	6. Worried sick

_**A/N**: I am SO sorry for the belated update! I have had finals, and new semester has just started, and I have been sick. I hope I can update faster for all of you reading this! I'm still open for any ideas or suggestions so feel free to PM me or something. _

_**Disclaimer**: We all know who owns them._

* * *

Sephiroth let himself in Vincent's house. The darkness of the house hindering him not in the slightest. The gunman was avoiding him. The silver-haired man hadn't seen him in nearly forever(1) and the ex-Turk wasn't answering his calls either. The swordsman had heard the answering message enough times. Plus, Sephiroth wanted some Vincent tonight.

"Valentine! I know you are in here! Get your pretty, scrumptious, pert..." the ex-General shook his head slightly, "Get your ass out here, Vincent!"

A muffled and strangely stuffy sounding "Go away!" came from the direction of Vincent's bedroom. Curious, Sephiroth slowly approached the door and called out.

"Vincent?"

"No," the response sounded like an impertinent child refusing listen to his mother.

The silver-haired man tentatively opened the door to be greeted by an almost pitch black room and two glowing crimson eyes peering out from the top of the blankets.

"Go away," sniffled the man under the sheets.

Sephiroth blinked a few times to adjust his eyes to the dar—wait, _sniffle_? The swordsman swiftly strode to Vincent's bedside and sat on the edge of the bed.

"Are you sick, Valentine?" he asked.

"I said, go away," was all the ex-General got.

Slightly put out, the one-winged 'angel' placed his hand on Vincent's forehead and his eyes widened. Fevers weren't supposed to be this high.

"What was your temperature when you last checked it, Valentine?" Sephiroth's voice had adopted a brisk, yet worried tone.

"One hundred twenty degrees Fahrenheit," mumbled the ex-Turk, aiming a weak glare at the swordsman.

"_One hundred twenty?_" the younger man urgently grabbed Vincent by the shoulders and shook him slightly, "Why the _hell_ didn't you call me, someone, _anyone_! Shit, Vincent! You should be _dead_ right now!"

"Sephiroth, I'm alright. Calm down. It's just a little fev—"

"Calm down? No, Vincent, you are _not_ alright and it is _not_ just a little fever! Your temperature is _one hundred twenty_," the distraught man snapped.

"Sephiroth! Will you just listen to me!" cried out the gunman, unable to get Sephiroth's attention any other way.

"_What_?"

Vincent coughed slightly before continuing.

"When I tell you that I am alright, I am alright. Had I been seriously sick, I assure you, I would have called you. Now, as abnormal as my temperature may be I am not in danger of dying because when I get sick, my inner demons become ill as well and that is what causes my temperature to goes up so high. You were right though, I should be dead," explained the ex-Turk calmly, "if I were a normal human. However, a normal human I am not. Thus, this one hundred twenty degree fever bothers me just as much a minor fever for Tifa might."

Sephiroth let out a huge but barely audible sigh of relief. The gunman could practically see the tension leave the ex-General's form. Said man rested his elbows on his knees and rubbed his hands over his face. The older man smiled softly as he sat up. Gently, he put one of his arms around Sephiroth's waist and the other went up to move silvery mane of hair aside so Vincent could place a light kiss on the back of the younger man's neck. Sephiroth turned in the ebony-haired man's arms so they were facing each other. The silver-haired man delicately brushed a stray strand of ebony from Vincent's face.

"Do not _ever_ scare me like that again..." the one-winged 'angel' whispered.

The gunman chuckled, "You did it to yourself. You would not listen to me."

"Do you need anything?" the slightly taller of the two asked pulling away a bit.

"A glass of water and some soup, if you would," replied the sick man.

"Anything for you," was breathed against Vincent's temple just before a kiss was place right above his brow.

* * *

_(1) Forever for Sephiroth would probably be 2 days... XD_

_**A/N**: I hope this was to your liking Corncob! I was meaning to go farther but the last line summed it all up and I couldn't find much more to add. D: R&R if you please!_


	7. Moving in

_**A/N**: I haven't updated in a while... I am SO sorry! This one is completely silly and I just kind of let this "flow". It was another request from Corncob who asked for these two getting into a petty fight then a lovely make up. Though I wouldn't say the make up is "lovely"... "strange" perhaps? "Bizarre"? Ah, well you'll just have to see for yourselves!_

_**Warning**: Lots of OOC on Sephiroth's part... cos he's a dork X3_

_**Disclaimer**: I only wish..._

* * *

It was quiet and peaceful; the perfect day for a workday. Vincent had taken up working as a Turk again for the sole reason of having something to do with his life. Normally, he would do paperwork, clean out the weapons, or re-make a specified weapon that had been broken beyond repair. Rarely ever was he sent on missions; only when it was strictly necessary for the deadly marksman to take over the mission.

Vincent was typing away at the keyboard in front of him, finishing up the report due in two days. Suddenly, there was a jerking movement, and the next thing Vincent knew, there was a tongue in his mouth and he was responding. When had he closed his eyes?! He was getting too used to this; the gunman sighed mentally.

Slowly but surely, Vincent's fingers found their way to the silky hair of his "unknown" assaulter, and they buried themselves there. His tongue slid against the other, stroking it. He wrapped his own around the intruding tongue and sucked. Hard. There was a low, throaty groan and he ended up with a lapful of Sephiroth.

"What if it had not been me?" the ex-General asked against the gunman's lips in a husky voice.

Vincent snorted. "The only person who would ever do this to me is you, fool."

Sephiroth smirked. "It seems out positions are switched though, Valentine. It is usually you in my lap. And most of the time, trembling."

The once ex-Turk rolled his eyes and gently nudged at the silver-haired man to get off.

"Have some respect for you elders," the gunman chided jokingly, still pushing gently at Sephiroth.

Finally getting the hint, the younger man moved off Vincent and leaned one hip against the desk.

"I do not know why you will not let me move in. This house is too big for one, I'm over here nearly everyday, and I already have the keys," the swordsman arched a silver eyebrow.

"No. Absolutely not," deadpanned the ebony-haired man, returning to his work.

"Why the hell not?! That's what I want to know!" Sephiroth shot at Vincent, clearly upset.

"You distract me enough without living here, Sephiroth. I now have a job, I'd like to keep it," the gunman snapped.

"Job?" Sephiroth scoffed. "What job? Have you taken up being a Turk again?"

There was no answer.

Sephiroth sounded suspicious. "You didn't..."

"If I did...?" came the calm response.

"You did!" the silver-haired man said incredulously. "Why? After what they did to you!"

"Those people are long since gone and the leader is now Rufus ShinRa. I highly doubt he would let anything like that happen again. Though you have nothing to say... you rejoined ShinRa Company as well."

"..." there was silence.

"Exactly."

"Well, you have a nice ass," retorted Sephiroth.

"Was that supposed to be insult?" Vincent quirked an eyebrow.

"I couldn't think of anything else, so shut up, you Turkey," the swordsman almost pouted.

"Quit being immature, Sephiroth," the Turk shook his head slightly.

"Your fish likes me better than you!" Sephiroth huffed.

Vincent felt a twitch coming on.

"Mr. PoofyCheeks likes me just fine, thank you," the gunman grit out.

"Mm–hm, sure. Tell that to Cheeks, who swims happily in the jar on my desk," the 'one-winged angel' bit out sarcastically.

"You were complaining about him a few weeks ago!" the raven-haired man exclaimed in frustration.

"We've grown on each other! Don't doubt our love! I can't believe you! You don't even understand! We could grow to love each other!" the forced 'abstinence' caused Sephiroth's sanity to crack temporarily right down the middle and he stormed out of the room.

Vincent blinked. What the _hell_ had just happened?! He shook his head in disbelief and decided that the ex-General needed time to calm down, so he returned to work. Soon enough, Vincent was finished and he headed towards the living room knowing Sephiroth would be there. The ebony-haired man came to a halt when he heard what Sephiroth was saying to himself... or more specifically one of his body parts.

"DAMNIT! I'M NOT SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED! BLOODY HELL!"

The gunman was caught completely off guard. What in the _world_?!

Sephiroth's shoulders slumped in defeat as he looked at his crotch and spoke to it?

"You're not helping one bit, you dick. Yes, you can help it! I'd rather not be a penis thank you! No, I'm not giving you attention until you apologize! Not even Jill(1) will help you out..."

'_What is he talking about? What is he talking __**to**?_' the Turk thought to himself.

Another voice echoed in his head.

'_As much as I'd like you tell you dearest Vincent, I'm fucking stumped with this one too. Methinks he's holding a conversation with his crotch...?_' Chaos sounded rather amused.

'_So... he's talking to his dick._'

'_Well, he did say it._'

"No! Don't protest! Do not argue with me! Jill(1) will not help you out!" There was a pause. "Did you just twitch?! You better have not twitched just now," the silver-haired general seemed to have completely lost it.

Vincent smirked. "You should listen to it... "

A glare was shot at the raven-haired man.

"Can you not see I am trying to talk some sense into my genitals?" Sephiroth didn't realize Vincent was being provocative.

"I'll talk to them for you..." was said as an evil smirk slowly spread across his face.

The ex-General held up his hands.

"No, no! I got this!" he looked back to his groin. "What do you mean you don't like the way I run things? Well, I apologize that I am in an argument with my lover so I can't fuck the brains out of him. So, until you get your act together and we make up, you won't be getting any Vincent-ass, understood? Good boy."

There was a blink and Sephiroth looked up at Vincent.

"I'm horny. I want you, Vincent. Please let bygones be bygones and let us screw like there is no tomorrow and like we have forever," a hint of desperation colored the swordsman's words.

"Is that you talking or your cock?" Vincent said with an amused glint in his eye.

The younger man shifted uncomfortably for a moment.

"...both?"

"Maybe I should have you move in... you are an endless source of amusement," Vincent chuckled as he placed himself in the ex-General's lap and licked said man's lips.

In a flash, Sephiroth had Vincent pinned under him, devouring the raven-haired man's mouth and grinding their hips together. The lack of oxygen pulled them apart.

"Hell, you make me _hard_," the swordsman nibbled on Vincent's throat.

"I can... ah, se—_feel_ that..." Vincent groaned out wrapping his legs around Sephiroth's waist.

"Though I must say, Cheeks gets to stay in my room," the silver-haired man grinned.

"We'll be sharing a room," the older man growled out as he tugged the still grinning man down for a fierce kiss.

* * *

_(1) Just for the people who don't know/get this: If you look at the back of your right hand when it's opened the index finger and thumb make the "J" and the middle, ring, and pink fingers make up the "I L L" XD Thus, Jill.  
(Corncob just reminded me that our beloved Sephiroth is a lefty so if you look at the palm of your left hand, it still works. X3)  
_**  
_A/N_**_: I am taking requests because I'm in need of ideas and this is pretty much an "open to any Sephentine idea" drabble fic, so throw them at me! Hope you enjoyed! Read and review if you please._


	8. Valentine's Day

_**A/N**: This is a week late but I haven't been able to get on the computer for the longest time! TTATT I'm so sorry!! Happy belated Vincent's Day!_

_**Disclaimer**: Don't cry, Yazoo. I don't them... or you. (Inside joke with VannRamos)_

* * *

It was that day: the day where 'love' was saturated the air, the day where sickening confessions were around every corner, it was the day people had the right to be sappy, disgustingly sweet, and mushy then not get hounded for it. It was the day where the AVALANCHE members would tease him unmercifully about his last name. It was the day where Yuffie Kisaragi would try and win him over; even when he had repeated multiple times he had a significant other. He had broken it to them when he had decided to rejoin the Turks again. Cloud, Barret, and Cid all had nearly had a heart attack, Tifa had looked at him weirdly, and for Yuffie it went into one ear and out the other. 

"_She is most likely in denial. I am almost certain had Cloud said he was in a relationship with another man, Kisaragi would have squealed or had a nosebleed; whichever came first_," Vincent thought. Though he also thought it sounded rather conceited of him to think that she was so infatuated with him that she would be in denial about the whole thing. He shook his head.

As he walked down the hallway to the cafeteria, he realized, strangely no one had said anything relating to his name so far today. He wondered... oh, right. He had been arguably the most terrifying Turk in Shinra; if someone cracked a joke about him they 'obviously had a death wish'. Vincent scoffed. But those days were done, buried, long since gone. However, that didn't mean it didn't amuse him to no end when the other Turks and executives alike all scattered like mice wherever the direction of his glares went. Though his no-name-mocking time wouldn't last too long. Only Reno, Rude, Tseng, and Rufus would 'have the guts to make fun of him'.

"Yo, Valentine! How you enjoyin' your day?" came Reno's voice from across the cafeteria. Speak of the Devil.

The whole cafeteria went silent, and Vincent smirked internally. Such idiots. He made his way slowly to the table with Elena, Tseng, Rude, Reno, and Rufus seated around it. He took the only seat left and turned to Reno.

"Since it's my day, I think you should get me that last piece of cake," Vincent glanced at the cake slice in question, then narrowed his eye dangerously when Reno groaned.

"That won't be a problem, will it?" the gunman asked menacingly.

Reno fidgeted. "No, not at all..."

The red head scurried back with the cake slice.

"Thank you so much," Vincent smirked.

"Yeah, yeah. No problem," Reno glared.

When the eldest Turk picked up the fork the EMR wielder had brought with the cake, he felt the sudden urge to be utterly evil. The fork sunk into the cake and Vincent bit the rather large piece. This caused the icing to coat his lips.

"Mr. Valentine, you have icing on your—oh..." Elena trailed off.

Vincent leisurely trailed his tongue across his upper and lower lips making the icing smear into his lips like a subtle gloss of shine. He repeated the gesture once more; this time leaving his lips moist and glistening with his own saliva. The gunman glanced quickly at the others from beneath his long eyelashes.

Elena's mouth made the shape of the sound she had made: 'Oh', Reno licked his own lips, Rude's sunglasses had slid down his nose, Tseng's hand covered the lower half of his face as he glanced from the fork back to Vincent's face, and Rufus audibly swallowed. All five of them sported identical blushes. Vincent felt smug. Oh, yeah... he still had it.

At the sudden vibration against his leg, Vincent pulled out his cell phone. When he flipped it opened, there was a text message for him.

'_Get in your office right now. I want a quick lunch fuck then at home I'm going to make love to you all night. It _is _your day after all..._'

Vincent snapped his phone shut while rolling his eyes. Only Sephiroth would.

"Something came up and I must leave. This cake is so delicious, it'd be a waste to throw it away. Would someone like to finish it for me?" the eldest Turk asked innocently as he got up to leave.

The others just sat there and stared at the cake. Vincent snorted and made his way back to his office. Just as he shut and locked the door, he was dragged into an intense, frantic, devouring kiss.

"Mmm... You taste sweet like cake," Sephiroth quirked an eyebrow. "You look positively evil and it's sexy as hell, but what did you do?"

"I'll tell you at home so shut up and kiss me."

That's exactly what the silver-haired ex-General did. Along with other things.

* * *

_**A/N**: I feel like my drabbles are not being written as well as they first were... DX I can't tell!!  
__Oh! I'm still working on those requests from SapphireMateria. Any more ideas? Tell me!_


	9. Conference

_**A/N**: I apologize for such a late update! I really do need to work on updating faster... -sigh- Oh! I finally saw turk!Vincent (meaning I finally got to play DoC) and I am so happy! :D He's so gorgeous, it's insane. This one is a request by SapphireMateria and I hope you enjoy it, dear! There's another one for you coming up soon!_

* * *

Long, slender fingers flipped though the mediocre reports that had been turned in a couple of days back. Most of them were half-assed and sounded like the writer waited until the last minute. _Idiot students_. There were, of course, a few decent ones but none were even close to being on par with the report sitting in the hands right then. It belonged to an exceptional student at Shinra University: Vincent Valentine.

Vincent Valentine was quiet, soft-spoken, but had an intensity that was concentrated purely in his blood-red eyes. That very intensity seemed to spill out and take form in his works no matter what it was. The student was nearly flawless; a genius pupil, mature, polite, and on top of that, Vincent Valentine was beautiful. The ebony hair that fell passed his shoulders was an unruly yet attractively disheveled mess that was kept out of his eyes with a scarlet, silken cloth. Valentine usually wore black denim pants with a black t–shirt and beneath it a red, long-sleeved shirt. It was strange but it complimented him to the fullest extent. The red of his sleeves brought out his eyes. The shirts in general fitted his lithe form while his pants emphasized his long legs.

The only flaw as a student was his attendance record. The only times he ever showed up were to turn in papers, or to take tests or finals. But he passed those with ease. So in truth, it didn't really matter. But the grader of the aforementioned papers wanted to see more of Vincent Valentine. The professor wanted to have those keen eyes upon him as he lectured, he wanted to see that head of ebony sitting in his classroom, he wanted to watch the student work, he wanted to let his gaze linger on the pupil's lips which were licked or bitten purely out of habit, he wanted to be behind Valentine when he was bent over a desk which was precisely why he had set up a teacher–student conference that day.

* * *

Footsteps sounded against the floor and echoed down the hallway. Vincent looked at the slip of paper in his hand.

'_I would like to speak with you when all of your classes are over today_.'

Beneath that was the illegible scrawl of a signature that belonged to his Literature professor. Vincent wondered why in Shiva's name his professor would want to see him. He hadn't done anything wrong. He had the highest grades in all of his classes. Maybe it was because he wasn't showing up to class except for when it was strictly mandatory. Still, the rest of his teachers really didn't care. He knocked on the door to his professor's office.

"It is open," a muffle voice called from inside.

The ebony-haired student slowly opened the door and slipped into the office.

"You wished to see me, Professor Sephiroth?" Vincent gazed steadily into his professor's stare.

Something about the cat-like pupils and the long silver hair always made shivers go up his spine, in a way Vincent wasn't sure whether he liked it or not. Not to mention that voice; it was deep, velvety. Very much like his own but with an underlying of danger and an essence of sensual dominance.

"First, take a seat," Sephiroth gestured to the chair in front of the desk.

Vincent slid gracefully into it and waited patiently.

"Yes, I would like to speak with you. It's about your attendance record. You only seem to show up to class when it is absolutely necessary," the silver-haired instructor started as he adjusted the rectangular-rimmed spectacles perched upon his nose.

Bingo. So it _was_ about his coming to class, or lack thereof.

Sephiroth stood up, walked around to the side of the desk and leaned his hip against it.

"I am merely wondering why you only come at the crucial times of class. I mean, you are a brilliant student and the others could learn from you as well as they could from me. You seem to know the topics very well. It would also be a good experience for you to interact with the students in your class, to practice your communication skills, Mr. Valentine," the instructor advised him.

Leisurely, the silver-haired man walked to the front of his desk and sat on the edge of it in front of Vincent. Their knees ended up touching because the chair Vincent sat in was positioned so closely to Sephiroth's desk. Vincent abruptly stood up, unable to withstand the strange, awkward tension. But that only caused him to be even nearer to his instructor.

"I understand. I will try to be in class everyd—Professor, why is your finger in my belt loop and why are you tugging... on it...?" the ebony-haired student seemed to be mildly distressed.

"Hn," Sephiroth smirked. Then all at once he gave a sharp pull, tangled his free hand into the long black hair, and buried his nose into Vincent's throat.

"Mm... smells good," the instructor hummed.

The humming and the warm breath on sensitive skin caused a near violent shudder to rack Vincent. Slowly, the hand in the ebony locks trailed down to Vincent's other hip. Soon the student found his gut twisting and coiling in ways he did not know were possible from the ten fingers digging into his hips. Vincent gripped the upper arms of his professor as the silver-haired man traced the thrumming vein with his tongue. Now near trembling, Vincent could not stop the loud moan that was wrenched from his throat.

"I have decided I rather like that noise..." his instructor whispered as the mouth moved up to ghost over the student's lips.

Suddenly, Vincent found their positions switched and his teacher now was standing between his legs.

"You have no idea what you do to me, do you...? And just so you know, I am a selfish bastard who gets what he wants and I want you," with that Sephiroth slid his tongue into Vincent's mouth.

To that the student more than gladly responded by coiling his tongue around his professor's and sucking not so gently. The Literature professor groaned and let his hands wander to the ebony-haired student's well-formed ass and _squeezed_ as he drew Vincent to a standing position. Vincent gasped into the kiss and jerked forward at the new sensation, unknowingly pressing their straining, clothed arousals together. Sephiroth growled deep in his throat, gripped the hips harder and rocked against the lithe body in front of him. The raven-haired man threw his head back at the onslaught of pleasure and gave long, keening moan as his fingers curled into the lengthy silver hair. The silver-haired man bit down on the pale neck exposed to him; not hard enough to bleed but hard enough to leave a mark.

The door opened and a small brunette girl poked her head in.

"Professor Sephiroth, I have the copies you asked fo—eep! I apologize!!" the girl squeaked as she slammed the door and scurried away, face red from embarrassment.

Sephiroth sighed and Vincent quirked an elegant ebony eyebrow.

"You have left both of us with quite a problem, Professor. I think you should alleviate our conditions."

Twin smirks appeared on the men's faces.

The silver-haired man replied, "Your place or mine?"

"Mine. That way you can meet my roommate and he can approve of you."

"Your _roommate_?" the voice held a skeptical tone.

"Yes, roommate," came the affirmative response.

"What is his name?"

"Mr. Poofycheeks."

* * *

_**A/N**: How many of you saw that one coming? XD I enjoyed writing this though I got stuck quite a few time. Ugh, it was just jfowenlknvoaiflkweq. I only have one more request left to do and I really need some ideas. It's not that difficult, right? Just click the little button and type in a few requests. I don't care if it's cliche, random, dude-what-the-hell-were-you-on, or even a topic that borders on mental instability. Send it to me. I'll see what I can do._


	10. On Stage

_**A/N:**__ I'm really not updating as much as I want to. -sigh- There is an "alternate ending" to this little fic for my beta because I haven't updated "Elusive" yet and I feel really, really bad. But I have finally reached the double digit mark (about damn time)! And I have almost 3000 hits for this. Thanks SO much for all of you support, I really appreciate it. :D_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing because if I did, I could make CGI versions of these and share them with the world. Or just the yaoi fans. XD_

* * *

Strife was going to die a slow, painful, torturous, suffering death.

He was going to _**die**_, and Vincent was going to enjoy killing the traitorous bastard. Being princess was Cloud's part, damnit! But the coward had run away at the last minute. To be Princess Claudia was Cloud's role. Cloud also had a reason for playing princess because he had cross dres—had been disguised as woman before!

Now Vincent was stuck being Princess Valentina. He also had to be out in about ten seconds for the last scene. On cue, somebody shoved Vincent out on stage and it took all of Vincent's Turk training and then some not to stumble. In a dress. And high heels.

His hand was held and Vincent looked down into glowing, smirking eyes that belonged to Sephiroth.

"Oh fair Princess; please accept this proposal of marriage."

There was a chorus of sighs from the crowd while some of the little kids hollered out 'say yes'. It was bad enough to be the princess for the children, but parents and friends had attended as well. Feeling a bit masochistic, Vincent glanced into the crowd. The gunman's eyes narrowed. Strife was in the back watching with a grin on his face! But Sephiroth's voice brought him back to the situation at hand.

'Prince Sephen' pulled 'Princess Valentina' against his princely body as he stood and put his free arm around the 'princess' bringing 'her' face close to his.

"Dear Valentina, why art thou scowling? Why doth thy perfect brows furrow?" asked a _seemingly_ concerned Prince Sephen. If only those eyes were not shining with mirth.

Vincent adopted an apologetic look and an amazingly accurate, sensual female alto. It helped to share a body with 4 different beasts. It made one's vocal chords _very_ flexible. Though anything above an alto pitch was impossible just because Vincent's voice was so deep.

"I apologize to thee, my Prince. I do not wish to give thee an unprepared and hasty answer. I was merely pondering my reply to thy proposal."

"Then what is thy answer? Please do not keep me from knowing any longer."

The look on Sephiroth's face pulled on the heartstrings of everyone, even Vincent. Much as the ex-Turk hated to admit it, he blushed.

"I accept."

No sooner had Princess Valentina spoken those words, Prince Sephen's lips descended upon 'hers'. The hand holding 'her' hand had relinquished its grip and cupped the back of 'her' head and the hands of the princess fluttered to the prince's upper arms.

The curtain fell and the audience cheered. Sephiroth pressed their bodies flush with each other and slipped in his tongue. The gunman's eyes widened as he was thoroughly kissed. The curtain was raised again and the ex-General spun him out to bow to the crowd; just in time for Vincent to curtsy. All of the other cast members walked out and they just stood there acknowledging the crowd for a good five minutes. All the while Vincent was _itching_ to strangle the blond bastard for putting him in such a situation.

As soon as the ebony-haired man was free to go, he headed straight for his dressing room when he realized he had nothing to change into. Tifa and Yuffie had cornered him at his own place. He had walked to the playhouse in full costume but thankfully they gave him something that big enough to cover his head and face (because they did not want anybody to know what he looked liked or so they said). And whenever someone asked why he was dressed like so or who he was, he told then that he was the princess in the play being shown at playhouse down the street; in the sultry alto voice he imitated so well.

Defeated for the moment (he was _not_ leaving with all those people out there), he sat in front of the dressing room vanity staring at his reflection in the mirror. Thankfully, the girls had not used stage make-up. Vincent shuddered at the mere thought. Instead, they had applied eyeliner, mascara, an extremely light blush just to color his cheeks and a subtle red gloss to his lips. The eyeliner brought out the red of his eyes slightly and mascara really did not do much; his lashes were long, black, and thick enough already. The blush and the gloss only seemed to add a softness to his usually creamy pale complexion. As he studied his own face, the blurred noises of everyone moving about, changing, meeting their friends from the audience, and being congratulated went through one ear and out the other.

When most of the noise had died down, Vincent heard snippets of things like "Who was Princess Valentina? Cos man, she was fine!", "Damn, the Princess was hot!", and "I'd tap the prince, too". The gunman's head jerked to the door and glared. Angrily, he reached for the make-up remover and some tissue. But before Vincent could do anything, Sephiroth let himself in still in costume.

"I did not know you could sound so much like a woman. If I had not have known you, I would have said you were a female," Sephiroth smirked as he sat in the chair next to Vincent's.

"Ugh, shut up. I do not want to hear it," the ex-Turk grouched at the younger man tiredly.

Vincent let go of the tissues and remover. He planted his elbows on the surface of the vanity and gingerly placed his face in his hands, not wanting to get eyeliner on his hands. Suddenly, he felt his chair disappear from underneath him. As he quit his mild squirming, the ex-Turk found himself in the silver-haired ex-General's lap.

"You know, technically, we are engaged now."

Vincent's head snapped up. "Excuse me?!"

"I asked you to marry me and you accepted," the swordsman quirked an eyebrow.

"That was in a play!" An incredulous look was thrown at Sephiroth and said man shrugged.

"I was just saying what it could imply."

Vincent rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Leave it to you to say something completely bizarre."

There was no response.

The dark-haired man looked up to the ex-General's face and opened his mouth to say something when a smudge on Sephiroth's upper lip caught Vincent's eye. Actually _looking_ at it, the gunman realized it was the lip gloss from when the silver-haired man had kissed him.

"You have lip gloss on your lips. Here, let me..."

Vincent reached up to wipe it off, only to have Sephiroth shy away and remove it himself. The ebony-haired man's cheeks colored. He felt like such a girl; to try and remove lipstick from his lover's face then to have the swordsman do it himself did not help. Then something in his brain clicked into place.

"You feel like I have rejected you, don't you?" Vincent leaned forward to try looking at the slightly taller male's face.

The ex-General shrugged again but did not meet the ex-Turk's gaze. The older man placed both hands on either side of Sephiroth's face to make their eyes meet and sighed.

"We might as well be married."

A wicked little smile tugged the corners of the younger man's lips. "Does that mean you will be my wife?"

A grudgingly fond look took over Vincent's features as he got up to leave. "You are absolutely impossible."

The younger male followed behind closely. "And you love me for it."

"Who said there had to be love between a married couple?"

The footsteps behind the gunman stopped and he turned around with a smirk.

"Now are you glad we are not married?"

Sephiroth let out a small growl with his face set to what looked suspiciously like a pout and caught up with his lover. As they reached the exit, the two saw a bouquet of white roses. Vincent picked up the bouquet and read the card inside it.

'_To my dearest friend: Princess Valentina,_

_I congratulate thee on thy engagement with Prince Sephen. May Shiva bless thy marriage. Keep in touch._

_Sincerely,_

_Princess Claudia_'

The ex-Turk thrust the bouquet and card into the ex-General's arms and stomped off with a murderous glint in his crimson eyes. Oh, so Strife thought he had a sense of humor, did he?

In a dress and high heels or not, Vincent was going to _**kill**_ Strife and enjoy it too.

* * *

**Alternate Ending**

"You feel like I have rejected you, don't you?" Vincent leaned forward to try looking at the slightly taller male's face.

The ex-General shrugged again but did not meet the Turk's gaze. The older man placed both hands on either side of Sephiroth's face to make their eyes meet and sighed.

"We might as well be married."

A wicked little smile tugged the corners of the younger man's lips. "Does that mean you will be my wife?"

A grudgingly fond look took over Vincent's features as he got up to leave. "You are absolutely impossible."

The younger male's breath ghosted over the gunman's ear. "And you love me for it."

The ebony-haired man's breath caught in his throat, and he watched Sephiroth grab his wrists and place his hands against the door. The silver-haired male could not keep from grinding into Vincent's backside while letting out a low growl. The older male found himself bracing against the door and pushing back, panting. Gods, he reacted too fast to the younger one's advances for his liking.

"You are horrible for wanting to..." there was a moan, "...me in a dress."

"I like the way you said that," Sephiroth smirked as he nuzzled Vincent's ear.

"It was not supposed to come out like that!" Vincent protested, blushing furiously.

The swordsman only chuckled as he hiked up the gunman's skirts.

"Just because I am dressed like a woman does not mean I am one! The dress will... get messy!" the ex-Turk tried to pull away.

"That is what condoms are for," Sephiroth purred as he gripped the slender hips in front of him and reached into his 'princely' pocket for said condoms and lube.

As much as Vincent protested, he could not bring himself to move away from the door. Suddenly, his eyes widened.

"You knew! You knew Strife was going to drop out! This was planned, wasn't it? _Bastard_. That is why you are so... 'well prepared'," the ebony-haired male squirmed but still did not move his hands.

At the soft chuckle from behind him, the gunman lifted his head to glare at the younger male but instead was met with a tongue in his mouth. It was then that he decided it was useless to fight anymore. So he gave in.

The sound of harsh gasps and strained groans echoed down the hallways. It even reached to the stage; though just barely.

Sitting, waiting all by its lonesome was a bouquet of white roses for Princess Valentina from 'her' dearest friend Princess Claudia.

* * *

_**A/N:**__ If you're wondering why Vincent's feet don't hurt, it's because he's magical and can withstand high heel pain. I hope you enjoyed that as much as Sephiroth did. X3 As always, read and review, please!_


	11. Ten years later

_**A/N:** FINALLY! I have another one up! XD This one was supposed to be the strip poker request by SapphireMateria, but it wrote itself and I couldn't stop it. Instead, I re-wrote the strip poker one on its own. And that will be up soon. :D You finally get to meet ! He makes an appearance and helps Vincent out with hi--Oh, you'll find out when you read this! Enjoy!_

**_Disclaimer:_**_ I don't even own the game or the movie. All I own are posters and a Vincent plush._

* * *

The child had been abandoned. Though now, he could be no longer be called a child. He had grown into an admirable young man; strong, beautifully built, intelligent, and undeniably good-looking. When Vincent Valentine had taken in the young man as a child, he had not even _dreamed_ of anticipating such an outcome. The young man's name was Sephiroth. It had been the only thing the younger man had as a child; no background, no family, no friends, no money, not even a last name.

Sephiroth had been ten years of age when Vincent, eighteen then, had bumped into him in an alleyway. The younger one had looked so pathetic with his huge, piercing jade eyes pleading to be taken in, cared for and loved. So, Vincent took him in. But ten years later found Vincent, now twenty-eight, almost regretting the faux adoption as he watched a twenty-year-old Sephiroth bend down to put on his shoes. Almost. The younger man stood up, straightened out his clothing, and flicked one lock of his silver bangs behind his shoulder.

"I'm going out," he called out as he opened the door and headed towards the sleek, black on black Mercedes Benz.

"It's about five now. Don't be out too late," Vincent told the younger male, leaning against the doorway.

Sephiroth rolled his eyes as he got in the car. "I am not fifteen anymore, _Mother_."

"Bah!" the ebony-haired man waved his hand dismissively.

'_I know..._' Vincent sighed heavily as he watched the car drive away. '_Sometimes I wish you still were though..._'

The twenty-eight-year-old closed the front door and walked back to his room. He had not always felt this way towards the younger man. No, before the age of seventeen, Sephiroth had been like a son to him. Vincent sat down at his desk and tried to clear his head. But instead he was bombarded by the memory of when his feelings towards Sephiroth changed, possibly for the worse.

_Three years ago, Vincent had come home late Friday night, and found the silver-haired youth fast asleep at the dining room table in nothing but his pajama pants. So being the responsible adult he was, the ebony-haired man had thrown one of Sephiroth's arms over his shoulder and half carried, half-dragged the teen to his room. At seventeen, Sephiroth had already surpassed Vincent's height of six foot by a good inch. So it was no wonder why the older male had tripped and stumbled over their longs legs, thankfully, landing on the bed. Though the silver-haired teen had landed on top of him._

_Vincent had gently tried to pry himself from underneath the youth but Sephiroth had stirred and purely out of reflex, Vincent had stopped moving. That had been his mistake. The younger male seemed to subconsciously realize there was a body under him and had sleepily wrapped his arms around Vincent's waist while nuzzling the older man's pale throat. Slowly, the nuzzling turned to something akin to sensual, feather-light stokes with the lips and tip of the nose. The slow breathing had warmed Vincent's skin considerably and the warmth spread up his neck, across his face as he ended up blushing. Suddenly, he was all too aware of his surroundings. A slender, lean thigh had slipped between his legs and pressed against him. The ebony-haired man had barely managed to choke back a gasp._

"Sephiroth_."_

_All that had elicited was a sleepy groan, a further burying into the crook of his neck, and a tightening of the arms._

"Sephiroth_, wake up!"_

"_Mm... what..?"_

"_You are on top of me."_

"_Huh? Oh! I'm sorry... but how did we get here?"_

"_You fell asleep in the dining room so I somewhat carried you to your room. But your long-ass legs tripped me, I fell over and you landed on me."_

"_Oh, I apologiz—"_

"_No, it's alright. I'm still alive and in one piece, so it's fine."_

"_You know, sometime I can't tell whether you're really sarcastic or not, Vincent."_

"_Good."_

_With that, Vincent had walked out with a smirk on his face. Thanking whatever higher power above for letting him leave before his 'problem' had gotten too prominent._

"_Wait! What the hell is that supposed to mean?!" Sephiroth had called out after him._

"_Language, Sephiroth, language..." was all that Vincent had responded with._

_Which had been rewarded with a groan and a thump as the teenager fell back on his bed._

Suddenly his cell phone vibrated, jarring him out of his memories and letting him know someone had sent him a text. When Vincent saw that it was just an automated message from the service company, he threw the phone on his bed like it burned, and snorted at himself for feeling a pang of disappointment at the fact it wasn't Sephiroth who had texted him.

Vincent spun around in his chair multiple times until he couldn't take it anymore. Leisurely, he leaned his face on his left hand while the right hand carefully drew the fishbowl on his desk close enough to run his fingers over the water. A little betta fish swam up to greet the familiar digits.

"Hey, Cheeks," Vincent called out to the fish fondly.

But the little betta swam away with his gills frilled out and swam around in his bowl agitatedly.

"Okay! Fine, I'm sorry! How's this? Hello, Mr. PoofyCheeks ."

Instantly, the fish relaxed and swam back to the fingers gliding through the water. The fish was a deep red that darkened even further to black towards the ends of his fins and had a white spot on the middle of his forehead.

Vincent sighed heavily. "You know the deal, Cheeks. Two bubbles mean 'yes' and one bubble means 'no', ok?"

Two little bubbles made their way to the surface.

"I've got it bad, don't I?"

Two bubbles.

"There's something wrong with me, isn't there?"

Two bubbles.

"I stand no chance against this... this thing."

Two bubbles.

"Fat load of help you are!" Vincent declared indignantly. "You have absolutely no faith in me!"

One bubble.

"Argh! I give up! I'll just tell hi—but... I don't have the guts."

One bubble.

"Jerk."

Two bubbles.

"You don't need to tell me anything. I already heard everything," cut in a voice colored with amusement.

"Sephiroth!" Vincent jerked out of his seat. "Why are you here so early? How did you get in here without me hearing? Most importantly, what and how much did you hear?"

"The event was cancelled, you were way too busy talking with your fish to hear me come in, and just enough. It's nice to know that the object of my attention–for four years now–returns the sentiments," Sephiroth replied, a teasing smile still lingering on his feline features.

The color in Vincent's cheeks deepened ever so slightly and he protested feebly. "I wasn't talking about you!"

"The lady doth protest too much. Vincent, denial isn't just a river in Egypt," Sephiroth grinned. He had always wanted to use those phrases.

"Those are such corny lines, you dolt!" the ebony-haired man glared almost accusingly.

"Keep talking like that and I'll start to think you actually like me," the silver-haired male smirked mischievously and approached the older man.

Vincent crossed his arms with his stance set determinedly. "I refuse."

"Why? And don't tell me that you fathered me at the young age of eight."

"You were like a son to me and the age ga—"

"The active word being 'were'. Plus the fact we are not blood related. Vincent, there are people who get married to other people who are old enough to be their parents. What is a measly eight years going to harm? People at ShinRa University think we're shacking up anyways," Sephiroth interrupted flippantly.

"Th-they _what_?! Why would they even... I can't believe..." Vincent sputtered, arms falling limply to his sides.

"There's no one else but you and you've driven me crazy for the past four years; since I was sixteen. Vincent, please," the younger man pleaded, eyes glistening and looking like a kicked puppy.

The face. Not the face. Vincent cringed internally. Sephiroth had not used that face since the day he turned eighteen and the older male felt his resolve slip.

"Four years, huh? That's a year longer than I suffered. Three hundred sixty-five days. I supposed it's only fair I put you out of your misery," the ebony-haired male sighed.

Notably, Sephiroth's eyes brightened, and slim fingers came up to trace an elegant, charcoal eyebrow.

"Three years. I could have had you three years ago; I could have had you that day you came home late, tripped over my legs and walk out with a boner," the twenty-year-old hummed.

"You knew about that!?" Vincent near squawked.

"Yeah, and so did Cheeks. I tell him everything. Don't I?"

Two bubbles escaped the little betta's mouth.

"Let's go to my room so we don't disturb the fish."

The older male was tugged into Sephiroth's room.

"There's no stopping you is there?"

The silver-haired male replied with a chuckle.

A single bubble rose to the surface.

* * *

_**A/N:** Read and review! Please and thank you! :3  
_


	12. Poker

_**A/N:** Here it is!! This one was fun to write. And for all of you who requested something, fear not because I haven't forgotten about you and your requests! Really! I have them written down in front of me so I am reminded daily. I just work rather slowly if you haven't noticed... -shifty eyes-_

_**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. It's quite obvious. I'm really broke. XD_

* * *

Two men sat across from each other; both with unreadable expressions and each with five cards in their hands.

Game: Strip poker  
Status: Tied

Both men sat in nothing but their silken black boxers at a table. Nothing was really at stake except the remaining piece of their clothing and quite possibly their dignity (or at least what was left of it).

Slowly, simultaneously, the cards were laid down face up. Vincent groaned in defeat, and Sephiroth smirked in triumph.

"Off with your panties, my pretty!" the ex-General cackled.

Vincent sighed as he rolled his eyes and stood up. Rather reluctantly, the ex-Turk reached for the top of his boxers.

"Stop," Sephiroth suddenly commanded.

Vincent stilled with his hands poised on the waist of his underwear.

"What...?" the gunman asked hesitantly.

"Come here," the silver-haired man said his voice dropping to a husky purr.

"Why?" Vincent seemed almost shocked.

"So, I can do that..." the swordsman rumbled and the ebony-haired man's eyes widened as he saw the pupils of Sephiroth's eyes dilate.

Vincent swallowed thickly and inched himself closer. When he was near enough, the ex-General curled his fingers around the slim hips of the gunman and jerked Vincent forward the rest of the way. The ebony-haired man barely managed to stifle a gasp as he caught himself on Sephiroth's shoulders.

The swordsman let out a low hum and nuzzled the gunman's navel. Vincent's head lolled back the same time his fingers tangled themselves in the thick, silky mane of silver.

Still holding the hips, Sephiroth placed a kiss just below the bellybutton; a kiss that transformed into a smoldering lick, a lick that traveled low enough to slip into the boxers, a lick that caused a shiver to go up Vincent's spine and a quiet moan to escape his lips.

The silver ex-General's fingers hooked into the boxers and peeled if them off excruciatingly slowly. The tongue traveled from one jutting hipbone to another. The ebony-haired gunman tensed as he gripped the thick silver his hands were already buried in. Vincent shuddered, and bit his lip. Heat pooled in his groin and sensation flared up inside; it danced along his skin and set his body on fire.

The ex-Turk bucked his hips reflexively and Sephiroth's lips twisted into a sensual smirk against Vincent's stomach when he felt something nudge his throat. Suddenly, the swordsman found himself being tugged into the bedroom and shoved roughly onto the bed. Vincent almost instantly latched onto nipple, and Sephiroth arched slightly, letting out a strangled groan at the sudden assault.

What a turn of events that was.

Long, slender fingers traveled lower and lower until they cupped the hardness straining against black, silk boxers. The silver-haired man damn near snarled as he flipped their positions. Lips crashed together. Tongues slid against each other. Fingers grasped and groped what they could. Amidst of it all, Sephiroth finally lost his boxers. Sounds of sex, pleasure so intense thinking straight wasn't an option and white dots in visions lasted all night long. It wasn't until the early hours of the morning did they stop.

At the crack of noon, Vincent finally dragged his sore ass out of bed (much to the protest of Sephiroth) to shower and clean up the cards. As the gunman picked up the cards, he rubbed a tired hand into his eyes. That was strange. The two cards in his hands looked identical; both, the ace of spades. Sephiroth had won with a Royal Flush: Ace, King, Queen, Jack, Ten all in the suit of spades. He pulled his hand back to look at the cards. Lo and behold, they were one and the same. The gunman growled as he came to the realization that his lover had cheated.

"Sephiroth, you cheating bastard!"

A very feminine sounding squeal came from the bedroom as the ex-Turk ran in and tickled the swordsman unmercifully.

* * *

_**A/N:** It's proven that if you review, any bishounen of your choosing will come and molest you when you're asleep at night._


	13. Last One Standing

_**A/N: **__This was quite a while ago, and some of you might have seen it (on dA), but __oh the things my brains spew out after the SATs. D8_

_It's short and probably should have been longer but meh, I liked it. :D This is how it should have been in Advent Children. Sephiroth and __Vincent__ should have fought and ended up humping each other. :3  
_

_**Disclaimer:**__ There's no point in suing me. First off, I don't have any money whatsoever, and second off, I don't own them. D:  


* * *

_

Jade clashed with crimson and the moment was tense. They seemed almost frozen in time; the ex-Turk with his hand poised above Cerberus in his holster and Sephiroth gripping the handle of Masamune. Suddenly the moment was broken; it shattered soundlessly with the narrowing of Vincent's eyes. In a flash, the cloaked man fired three times at the returned General. Just as quickly, Sephiroth blocked the first two with his sword and dodged the third one. Instantly, the silver-haired swordsman retaliated with a slice, stab, and uppercut with his katana. These were parried with a doctor's precision by Cerberus.

With inhuman speed and agility, the two matched-for-strength enemies fought relentlessly. Slowly, steadily, the rivals closed in. As Sephiroth brought his sword down, Vincent brought his gun up to parry the hit. It was a game; a game of who would be the last one standing and they were at an impasse. The two floated in the air for mere moments, until gravity lent her natural hand. Sephiroth, with sheer force, threw the ebony-haired gunman against the nearest vertical flat surface. Hard bodies collided and suddenly it was a game of something else altogether.

The gun and sword clattered to the ground as tension thickened and lips met with a hunger so fierce it was only fully expressed by the wandering, lingering hands that groped, tugged off, and toyed with what they could. Harsh gasps and strained groans escaped the bitten, bruised throats. And the only witness to their fraternization was the very façade they committed their deed upon.

* * *

_**A/N:** Woot! and you all thought I died. Hurhur... -shifty eyes- .... -COUGH-... I'm back and writing again! I also don't think I'm ever going on an overseas trip ever again. Well, at least not for a while and definitely not over a month. Guh, it was difficult for me to get back into writing. D: Remember to read and review!_


	14. Ice Cream

_**A/N:** Another update! In the same night? Unheard of! Haha, I have one more after this one so keep your seat belts on, darlings!_

_**Disclaimer:** You know, I think I might stop doing these because we all know who Vincent belongs to... that's Sephiro--I mean, the both of them belong to Squeenix.  
_

* * *

It starts out in a bar with a tall, young man with long, silver hair that cascades passed his hips

He's on a platform singing with a lidded smirk on his face. "_You're beside me on the seat, got your hand between my knees, and you control how fast we go by just how hard you wanna squeeze…_"

This is the last song for the night and he can go... to another random inn for he has no permanent home.

He finishes the song, gets his paycheck, and exits the building through the back alleyway with his bag. At the same time, a tall, dark, red-cloaked man leisurely pays his check and walks out into the biting cold air. He turns to his right, making his way to the mansion. The young man reaches the mouth of the alleyway and takes a left. Both are so distracted by their thoughts that they run into each other. The young man is nearly knocked down to the ground but a shiny golden claw wraps around his arm and prevents him from falling. The dark-haired man blinks.

"You were the one singing on stage..." his voice is deep, throaty, and smooth as velvet.

With one sweep of his unique scarlet gaze, he comes to the conclusion that the silver-haired man is rather nomadic. And he does not wait for a response.

"It seems that you don't have a permanent place to stay," he observes. "I suggest you stay at the Valentine Estate."

The drowning pools of emerald that are the silver-haired singer's eyes narrow warily.

"And you suggest this why? So that you can make me a conquest?" suspicion laces his voice as the singer speaks.

The accusation would have more impact if sexual frustration were not rolling off the younger man in waves.

The ebony-haired man would like to blame it on the fact he is barely human now, and all of his senses have been heightened massively. But alas, he cannot; the only thing he can blame it on is the fact that he is still indeed a male. And all he can blame it on is that thirty years of 'forced' abstinence has heightened one particular 'sense'. The scarlet-eyed man sighs inaudibly.

"No, I am merely offering you shelter for it is not safe out in the open like this."

Thirty years of abstinence will not make him lose control. The gaze of the skeptical younger male clearly says, "What makes you think I'll be safer in a closed-off mansion with you than out here with loads of running/hiding space?' Nonetheless, the young man agrees and follows him home after a trading of names.

"Vincent Valentine."

"Excuse m--oh... Sephiroth."

When they enter the mansion, Vincent gestures into the dark abyss.

"Make yourself at home."

"I would... if I could see in the dark," a silver brow is raised.

Vincent often forgets that he needs to turn on the lights for others because he, himself, does not need to; though instead of flicking on the lights, he uses the dimmer to lighten the room a little at a time. He leads his guest to an empty guest room that is near his just in case problems arise.

The young man places his bags on the floor and Vincent cannot keep his eyes from roaming along Sephiroth's figure. The taller of the two straightens up and the dark-haired male gazed is firmly attached to the delicate nose of silver-haired man.

"May I use the bathroom...? Are you staring at my nose?"

Fortunately, for Vincent there is a fuzzy on his guest's nose and he uses this as an excuse.

"There is something on your nose..." the gunman states blandly as he reaches out and brushes it off.

Sephiroth stands absolutely still; not moving except for his eyes that follow his host's hand causing him to go cross-eyed.

"The bathroom is further down this hall third door to your left."

"Thank you... twice?"

Vincent nods and walks out to his own master bedroom to clean up as well. When he is finished, he walks out and senses the silver-haired male's presence has moved into the kitchen. Curious, he makes his way down the stairs to the kitchen.

The young man is standing in front of the refrigerator in a large tank-top and loose PJ pants mumbling something about "where the hell's all the food", "must be fucking vampire...", and "Bahamut's shit on a stick".

The corner of the ebony-haired man's lip curls amusedly. "That would be a very large... piece of shit."

Sephiroth starts as the dark voice floats through the kitchen, and he whips around resulting in the refrigerator door slamming shut; which in turn makes him jump once more, the cloth of his pant leg making him slip.

With inhuman speed, Vincent reaches out to catch the emerald-eyed male and block the impact of the fall, but the both of them end up in a tangled mess on the floor.

"Are you alright?" the older male asks thickly only too aware of the firm body beneath him.

Sephiroth shivers as he feels his host's voice vibrate against his chest. When he glances at the dark-haired man's face, it is unexpectedly too close to his. Their lips are only a hair's breath away and the tall young man moistens his for they are suddenly dry. This motion plus the closeness causes the silver-haired male to lick the ebony-haired gunman's lips too. The next thing they know, they are locked in a fierce battle; mouths devouring each other, tongues curling and sliding against one another, hands exploring and mapping new terrain. Moans are swallowed and groans are muffled from the hard, rough, desperate kiss.

The need for skin on skin contact becomes too great and clothes are removed. Both tank tops are thrown overhead, pajama bottoms are pushed down and off to the side, and Sephiroth's silk boxer briefs are shredded by the golden claw.

The moment they are both naked as the day they were born, their eyes meet.

Silence reigns for a grand total of one minute, and as the seconds tick away a need, an urge, a frantic demand from deep inside built until the two on the floor could not take it anymore.

"You wouldn't have..." the silver-haired male starts.

"Chocolate ice cream...?" Vincent finishes.

"Yessss...." Sephiroth hisses.

Fifteen minutes later finds the two men draped in blankets and nothing but. The silver-haired male is curled up against the older man content where he is. The Pokémon movie is playing and they are sharing a large bowl of chocolate ice cream.

* * *

_**A/N:** That was spawned off of a dream I had. Hope it was as amusing to you as it was for me. Haha, remember to leave reviews!_


	15. Potion

_**A/N:** A third update! This, I believe, is by far the most 'mature content' one of all the Sephentine drabbles I have on here, most 'serious' one too. This also was based off a dream of mine. Me and my semi-dysfunctional brain. -pats brain-_

_**Disclaimer: **You know what is supposed to be here so instead Vincent will sing.  
Vincent: I will not.  
Author: Oh, I meant in the drabble, silly. And it's a whole different kind of singing.  
Vincent: Harassment!  
Sephiroth: Oh but you want it... -smirk-

* * *

_

An ebony-haired man slips in and out of consciousness. Void fills his vision and slowly it withdraws. Finally, he can see clearly, and he hears sinister voices in the dark. So he gets up and starts to leave but someone grabs him by the hair and throws him back down to the ground. Suddenly his wrist and ankles are held down. A liquid is forced down his gullet. Sensations, heat, and tingles spiral in his gut; he is artificially aroused. The liquid is an aphrodisiac like potion. The only way to get rid of the constant arousal is for him to reach orgasm by someone other than himself.

He feels someone unbutton and unzip his pants and yells out, "NO!!"

Sephiroth is walking by this alleyway and hears Vincent's scream. He strides towards the noise to see the scene of Vincent being held down. Swiftly, he breaks the neck of the bastard who is undoing the pants and knocks out the two holding the ebony-haired man down.

Sephiroth crouches next to Vincent and asks him, "Are you alright?"

Vincent trembles; unable to get up because he is at such a painful, exquisite point of arousal. The silver-haired man realizes that Vincent cannot rise and picks up the trembling man. But what he does not know is that Vincent is riding on the effects of the only known sexual potion.

Sephiroth takes his pseudo-patient home and tells Vincent to take a shower, hoping that a shower will help his condition. Vincent barely manages to take a shower. When he comes out of the shower, there are clothes hung on the clothing hook. Shakily, he puts on the loose, black cotton pants and the white shirt that is two sizes too big. Clutching the doorway like a life-line, the ebony-haired man near hobbles out of the bathroom. Fortunately, Vincent is picked up again by Sephiroth who is waiting outside. The silver-haired man places his guest gently on his bed and makes to rise. However, Vincent's arms are still wrapped around his neck and he won't let go.

The ebony-haired stranger is panting softly into his ear. Slowly, a hand trails from the silver-haired man's shoulder to his wrist. The hand leads Sephiroth's to cup the erection straining against the cotton pants. This is Vincent's fate and now Sephiroth understands.

Vincent slides his hand over Sephiroth's and guides the large, pale, and slender hand to massage his throbbing erection. One arm is still clutching the silver-haired man's shoulder resulting in Vincent groaning lowly in Sephiroth's ear. Heat pools in the silver-haired man's groin but he restrains himself. However, soft pants do not help.

Sephiroth lets himself slide his hand into the black cotton and curls his fingers around the pulsing arousal. Suddenly, fingers find themselves buried into thick silver as Vincent presses his nose into Sephiroth's ear, a breathy moan escaping the parted lips. Fingers tighten their grip and they start stroking, pumping. Steadily, the pace picks up. Soon enough, Vincent is writhing, squirming in his savior's strong arms. The sensations are driving him insane; heat flares from inside licking along his skin. Vincent could not last much longer. Suddenly, his lips are captured by Sephiroth's and tongues glide and slip against each other.

At the same time, the silver-haired man does this odd motion with his finger as he strokes the arousal: he rubs the sensitive spot just behind the head of the erection. The intensity of the kiss and the little rub is too much for Vincent. Pulling away from the kiss, the head of ebony is thrown back with a hoarse cry as Vincent orgasms.

Over-exerted, Vincent falls limp on to the bed. Sephiroth removes the soiled pants and uses the clean areas to wipe off any excess fluids. The silver-haired man leaves the side of the bed to retrieve a clean pair of pants. After he slips the clean pants on his guest, he gingerly walks to the bathroom to get rid of the raging hard-on in his own pants. For the sake of Vincent and his own, he does not take advantage of the ebony-haired stranger's state. With sheer will power, he leaves their dignity intact. But he does let himself fantasize about the ebony-haired stranger lying upon his bed.

Sephiroth removes his clothing and steps into the shower. As Sephiroth now strokes his own arousal, he thinks about those long legs wrapped around his waist as he thrusts again and again into the tight entrance of his guest. That voice moaning, panting in his ear, and screaming his name. Soon, the silver-haired man is coming, crying out quietly. Then he realizes that he does not know the stranger's name. Quickly, he finishes his shower and walks out with nothing but a towel.

He reaches his room and finds Vincent sitting up. Vincent looks up and quickly looks away, face coloring slightly. Hurriedly, Sephiroth puts on some clothing and inquires his guest's name. Vincent tells him, "Vincent Valentine. And you?" The silver-haired man responds with. "Sephiroth Crescent." For the first time, they look each other in the eyes and both share the same thought, _His eyes... how odd_. Somehow, they end up sharing the bed. Before they drift off to sleep, they share one last heated, lingering, smoldering kiss.

* * *

_**A/N: **This reminds me: if you think I have forgotten all of your lovely requests, fear not! Because I have not forgotten. Honest. I have them and are working on them currently. Thanks for being patient! I'm in my senior year of high school so I'm not sure how often I will be able to update. But I will try as hard as I can. A wise man once told me, "__recent studies show that reviewing makes you sexier..."._


	16. Fairytale

_**A/N:** LOOK! An update! -EPICFAIL- I reeeally need to work on updating. I apologize. It really shouldn't be that difficult seeing as they are only drabbles. But yes, this was a request and I honestly cannot remember who asked for it. -grovels-_

_**Disclaimer:** I don't think that disclaimers are necessary. I mean, who owns them? Square Penix._

_P.S. I know that Lucretia was only a hologram-ish thing left by her memory. This just worked itself into the story.  
_

_

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_

Once upon a time, there was a lonely man... vampire... thing. He was sexy; let's just leave it at that. His name was Little Red Riding Valentine. Actually, it was Vincent Valentine, but let's humor the narrator for a bit.

He was hopping from glowy tree to glowy tree, passing through the Forgotten City to the cave that held his former love. As Little Red Riding Valentine was traveling from his faraway land of Kalm to the cave of his deceased love, big, bad Sephiroth destroyed the crystals and disposed of the woman's body. Meaning, he burned it until only ashes were left.

It went a little something like this:

_Two thwacking __sounds__ resonated, caused by a ridiculously large katana hitting against crystals._

"_Sephiroth? What in Chaos's name are you doing?"_

"_Don't say my future lover's name in vain, bitch."_

_Grunt. Another thwack sounded. Then a long cracking sound followed by a thud made itself known in the small cave._

"_What are you—?"_

"_You are __**dead**__ and have been that way for a __**while**__. I will _properly_ cremate you. Then _properly_ bury your ashes ten feet under. After that I will _properly_ respect my _properly_** dead**__ mother."_

"_You can't do this!"_

"_What is stopping me?"_

"_He __**loves**__ me!"_

"_He can just as well learn to love another. Plus, you've had your chance, dearest __**Mumsies**__. But no, you went for that disgusting excuse for a human being, Hojo. I must thank you for that__**,**__ though; because if you hadn't, I would have never been born and my lovely Valentine would be graying about now."_

"_Why you—!"_

"_Goodbye, Mother."_

_The sound of flames engulfing a crystallized body echoed throughout the cave._

-END FLASHBACK-

When Little Red Riding Valentine approached the opening of the cave and entered it, he was utterly shocked at what he found: big, bad Sephiroth sitting regally upon the ruined remains of what used to be Little Red's deceased love with an ultimately smug look on his face.

"_Sephiroth_? How did you...—Where is Lucretia?" Little Red instantly noted the absence.

"Wrong line, Vincent," was all the silver 'angel' responded with.

A short sigh escaped the lips of the gunman, and he continued in a flat tone.

"Why, Lucretia, what strange eyes you have…"

"The better to see you with, my love."

"What long, silver hair you have."

"Courtesy of Jenova, naturally."

"What a lewd facial expression you are wearing."

"The better to seduce you with."

"You are not Lucretia; you are the World's Greatest Calamity. And that is your erection pressing into my navel."

"And now the star of your wet dreams. So, Little Chaos, Little Chaos, let me in."

"Not by the hairs on my chinny-chin-chin."

A gloved finger stroked said chin.

"But you have no hair on that lovely chin, so I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll _blow_ you out of your mind."

With that, our big, bad Sephiroth proceeded to erase all memories of Lucretia Crescent from Little Red Riding Valentine's mind.

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_**A/N:** Hope you enjoyed that. Remember to R&R!_


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